This is a new idea that has definitely come to me lately.
Yet I am now realising how important this is when it comes to relationships. Lasting relationships.
What I mean by coming full circle is starting from the beginning. You may know this from references in your family or in movies of old couples acting young again, mom and dad or auntie and uncle trying to dress in their old clothes. Trying to relive the past. Many would say reliving the past isn’t very fruitful since there are also negative things in the past, yet I know there are contexts where there are exceptions.
Reconnecting to the beginning of your relationships.
Some couples only do this by talking about it, looking at old pictures, though I think you can do much more than that.
Recently, planning for the future and thinking about very serious things has tired my SO and I out. We have been so focused on getting things right and not making a mistake, trying our best to be the most responsible and intelligent as we can be, that ironically- we lost our focus on ourselves and what we enjoy with each other. Yes, we did do fun things together however we had lost touch of the initial enjoyment and atmosphere that we had.
That feeling of excitement, some silliness and puppy love.
Just because we had forgotten it, that doesn’t mean we can’t retrieve it once again. It’s not just a beginning of a relationship ‘thing’, it’s a part of us that we showed each other at the beginning of our getting to know each other and while we explored others, those parts are still there. They just haven’t been explored as much since then.
That excited, happy and new you from that beginning is still there and can always come back.
You know what would bring it back?
By going through the exact conditions that brought that part out in the first place- diving into nostalgia and doing what you first did as a couple, as if you were doing it for the first time. The same places, same times of day, maybe even the same clothes, just to really work that nostalgia to the point that the both of you are swooning and sighing again.
Throughout the seriousness of life, you can easily forget such a great part of you and the relationship you both share.
This is how so many couples easily lose ‘the spark’ and since they don’t make it a practice of coming full circle and reconnecting with the past often enough or leave it too long, it becomes harder and harder to find ‘the spark’. Some never find it again, which then doesn’t bode well for their relationship’s future. It is the worst with married couples who just try to pass time and life by together and just have no spark, the perfect breeding ground for loneliness and resentment.
When you come full circle, you get a sense of not only the present positives and negatives, but also the past’s, giving you a fully rounded view of yourself, each other and the relationship you have. It makes you treasure what you have even more because you really get a sense of every single positive thing that’s ever been in your relationship from the moment it started. Engaging in this nostalgic excitement relieves stress and brings cheer, it can make you more confident in general because of the knowledge you gain. The things you appreciate.
So as for my SO and I, we have decided to come full circle, after the idea just came to me. Through all this worrying and planning for the future, we lost focus and the excitement we used to have. We are taking the nostalgia to the top level by revisiting our dates from the very first, all the way up until we became an official couple, in order. If the weather allows, I’ll even try to wear the same things I did then, I remember my outfits fairly well.
He already has ideas about it too and now I’m just starting to feel that nostalgic excitement once again. I really have a feeling that once we come back full circle, we will be more confident in facing our future plans and working as a team.
Are you now ready to come full circle?